Laurel Lance's Life is a Country Song
by Nicolette134
Summary: I wrote some of Laurel's finer, and some of her less than finer, moments into country songs. Laurel Lance was my favorite character on Arrow, besides Thea, and I actually started this little project pre- "Eleven Fifty Nine", so things have obviously gone a little sideways since then, which I've tried to incorporate into the story. Let me know in the comments if I missed anything!
1. Her Daddy Says He Ain't Worth A Lick

**AN: Just a short little intro into pre-island Lauliver.**

 _Her daddy says he ain't worth a lick  
When it comes to brains, he got the short end of the stick_

She knew what her father'd say if he'd known she was there. He'd say that running around and partying with rich trust fund types is no way to live, young lady, and that she should be home studying. That's the speech he'd given Sara when he caught her with Ollie at a party the week earlier.  
He'd grounded her too.  
And maybe her dad was right about this, he was right about a lot of things after all, but Laurel couldn't help but feel like he was wrong about this.

 _But she's young and man, she just don't care  
She'd follow Ollie anywhere_

Even though Ollie could be a bit of a dope sometimes, and he occasionally veered from the straight and narrow, she knew that deep down he was a good guy, and he made her happy. Isn't that what really matters anyway?  
Sure she someone's goes along with his asinine plans, and sure sometimes he hurts her, but it's not like it's intentional. He'd never willingly do something that would hurt her, it's just sometimes he drinks too much and thinks too little.  
He'd never cross that line though.  
 _  
She's in love with the boy  
And even if they have to run away  
She's gonna marry that boy someday_

Laurel knew it'd take time for her father to warm up to the idea. She knew it'd take time for _Ollie_ to warm up to it, too. But there was no doubt in her mind that, eventually, the two of them would end up together. Forgot all the other girls, all the booze and parties, once he grew up a bit she knew he'd see things her way too.


	2. Shoulda Just Called Him Whiskey

_Now the numb has set in  
He's gone like the wind  
And I can barely feel the pain  
_  
Ollie was always pulling the same shit with her. He and Tommy would throw a party or show up at a bar and start drinking their way to obvivion. Sometimes, they called her to give them a ride home or, more often, to bail them out of jail. It drove her crazy, yeah, but it was better than the alternative. The nights he didn't call. The nights she knew- _she knew_ \- he was with someone else, some other girl. It was so obvious, and so frequent, she almost didn't care anymore. Almost.

 _Shoulda just called it like I saw it  
I shoulda just called for help  
and ran like hell that day  
_  
It hurt, sure, but not being with him at all would've hurt more, surely. It made her happy- it gave her power- that despite all the drinks and all the other girls he still inevitably came back to her. They were destined to be together, he'd tell her, and stupidly she'd believe him, kissing him to wipe the shiteating grin off his face. She never should've let him pull her in though, to lull her into a false sense of security with his charm and thoughtfulness. She should've ran the moment she met him, because she sure as hell can't now.

 _The burn and the sting,  
and the high, and the heat,  
and the "left-me-wanting-more"  
feeling when he kissed me  
_  
She still wanted to be with him as pathetic as that is. She'd never been the girl to believe in fairy tales, but the one where the kind princess changes the roguish prince into a better man stuck with her. She wanted that; wanted to fix him, wanted to know that love of her was enough to make him _want_ to change his ways. Settle down. Be with her and only her. But she knew young men like himself needed to "sow their wild oats", so to speak, so she gave him time, distance, whatever he needed. Because she was sure- _so stupidly sure_ \- that he'd come back to her. Wouldn't he?

 _Shoulda just called him "Whiskey"  
I shoulda just called him "Whiskey"  
_  
But then he took it too far. Got lost at sea with her _goddamn sister_ and she doesn't know who she's more mad at him or her. So she doesn't think about it. She's not the princess anymore, she's Alice now, falling down the rabbit hole and into a bottle of whiskey.


	3. Don't Know What You Were Thinkin'

_Why you wanna  
Show up in a old t-shirt that I love  
Why you gotta tell me that I'm looking good  
_  
Laurel didn't exactly _hate_ Tommy, and she certainly couldn't blame him for the mistakes of two other parties, who shall remain nameless, but she wasn't exactly eager to rekindle a friendship with him post- post _all_ of it.  
So when she ran into him at Big Belly Burger- him wearing a smile and a relaxed t-shirt she'd gotten him for his birthday a few years back, rather than his new norm, a stuffy suit that was so _not_ him- she tried to avoid eye contact.  
That didn't stop him from buying her burger and complimenting her new haircut. He _would_ notice a detail like that.

 _Don't know what  
You were thinkin'  
You were doing  
Moving in for a hug  
Like you don't know I'm coming unglued  
_  
She and Ollie hadn't had a particularly healthy relationship to begin with, and she _knew_ Tommy'd known about it all along and hadn't told her; he had probably encouraged it, to be honest. That just wasn't the kind of friend she wanted in her life, not the kind of friend she needed.  
She knew she wasn't being fair- he'd lost a lot that day too, he and Ollie were like brothers- but she didn't have room in her heart for all her hurt and his.  
So when he hugged her goodbye she didn't hug back.

 _Why would you tell me that you call me up sometime?  
Maybe we can get a drink and just catch up  
Like that'd be enough  
No, that ain't enough  
_  
She almost laughed in spite of herself when he asked if she wanted to get a drink sometime. She wanted to explain she had a drink at _all_ times, thankyouverymuch, and that between her, Detective Daddy, and the Merlyn's they probably drank enough to drown a whole other yacht, so now she was good.  
She wanted to explain that without Ollie they really had nothing in common, nothing to talk about, and she _certainly_ wasn't going to talk about _him_.  
 _No, no_ , she thought, _I'll have plenty of drinks, just none with you_.

 _Why you gotta  
Why you wanna  
Make me keep wanting you_

 __But she couldn't tell him any of that, she didn't want to crush his spirits, because she knew, in spite of it all- his mom and best friend gone, his dad distant at best- that Tommy still saw the bright side things, and dammit, as far into the darkness as she's let herself go, it felt good to see a little light again.


	4. All We Do Right Is Make Love

_Ain't no reason running after something already gone  
_  
He was already infinitely less important to her than she was to him. She didn't take their relationship seriously- and how could she, knowing his track record- but she was everything to him. His link to his fast-fading past, but the key to what _could_ be a brighter future. Laurel knew not of the hold she had on him, but Tommy felt it, and he felt too the moment she wavered. He knew she'd soon be lost to him.

 _Take off your leavin' dress  
Let's do what we do best  
I guess everybody's got their way of moving on  
_  
As much as he tried to push the idea out of his head he couldn't help but feel like he was just a holding cell until Ollie returned. At first he'd felt it as a deep connection the two shared- a bond of loss and hurt that brought them closer together, to share in comforting each other- but once Ollie returned he felt a sharp tinge that he'd _always_ been just a stand in in the tortured woman's life. He knew it was ridiculous, there was no way Laurel could've known Ollie was still alive when they'd first gotten together, but he couldn't ignore the facts.

 _Girl rest your head one more time in my bed  
Love me like you loved me when you loved me  
And you didn't have to try  
_  
The worst part of it all was that it was tainting Ollie's return. No matter how much of him was ecstatic over his brother's return from the dead, there was still a guilty part of him that was jealous of the effect his return was having on Laurel. Their relationship had been going so well, but now the brunette was simply going through the motions- slipping away from him with every passing moment, every fleeting glance at Ollie.

 _Let's lay down tonight  
And kiss tomorrow goodbye  
_  
He supposed he'd have to settle for just being with her just physically- since emotionally seemed out of the question, and he wasn't quite ready to give her up all together yet. He didn't know how long he'd have with her at all though, soon, he knew, she'd kiss him goodbye.


	5. Let Those Words Roll Off Your Tongue

**AN: I'm, like, _really_ proud of this one, just sayin'.  
**

 _Don't worry about the damage done  
Just let those words roll off your tongue  
Even if you're lyin'_

He'd hurt her in past, and he was really trying not to be that guy anymore, but old habits are hard to break, he guesses.  
She knew it was a bad idea from the start, but she couldn't help wanting him, needing him, after depriving herself of his love for so long.  
What it all comes down to it- they knew it was wrong, but that just didn't matter.

 _If you really don't mean it, I don't care  
If you need a little buzz to get you there  
Then baby I'm buyin'_

She was with Tommy; Tommy was his best friend. He'd been with Sara; Sara, her sister. They'd both made mistakes, and they were sure to keep making them, but with the taste of whiskey on her lips- whiskey, how fitting- she couldn't bring herself to stop. Not that she needed the drink, she wasn't strong enough to fight whatever was between the two of them, she couldn't resist him when he was dead in the ocean with her sister, let alone now, when he was right in front of her. It was wrong for so many reasons, but being with him felt good. She felt like the girl she'd once been, full of optimism and possibility, not this hardboiled husk of who she once was.

 _Well couldn't you; Say you do  
Say you might; For tonight  
Have a heart; Bend the truth  
Even if you don't; Couldn't you_

He knew they couldn't last, hell they'd barely survived each other in the past, but he couldn't help imagining what it'd be like to be the two of them, together again. He'd spent five years with her faded picture his only anchor to the life he'd led, the man he was, the man he would be, he couldn't just let that all slip away. He didn't know what he'd expected for when he came, he hadn't allowed himself to think of it, but Laurel and Tommy? Even though he knew they were better for each other, he couldn't let go of what they once had had.

 _Mess me up; Get in my head  
Steal my t-shirt; Wreck my bed  
All night long; Like you used to  
Even if you don't; Couldn't you  
Say you do?_

Tommy was good, of course. And she loved him, she thinks. But being with Tommy was thing like being with him. They knew every inch of each other, they'd grown into those bodies together, and as such, he knew exactly what made her tick. Nobody had ever made her feel the way he did, and she knew, in a small, sad part of her heart, that no one ever would. You only get one chance at this sort of thing, and the two of them? They'd royally fucked it up. She'd be happy, of course, with others, love them even, but she was certain she'd never be made to feel like this again.

 _Yeah baby, I'm begging you to lead me on  
Say it feels good to be back in my arms  
And then don't call me_

He craved her touch, and reveled in the fact that she reciprocated. He knew it was vile to be so happy when he knew it wouldn't last, that he'd again leave her to pick up the broken pieces of her life. Things always broke around him, but Laurel kept coming back for more anyway. Maybe she was a glutton for punishment, or maybe she knew, like he did, that they were meant to be together. Soulmates. There'd been others, so many others, but he kept coming back to Laurel every time, because he knew, deep down, they belonged together, even if he was too scared to admit it even to himself.


	6. Until This Dream Is Gone

**AN: This song makes me cry, so it's in honor of my original favorite on this show. RIP Tommy- I wish you'd known Thea was your sister.  
**

 _I had a dream about a burning house  
You were stuck inside, I couldn't get you out_

She knew it was all her fault that Tommy'd gone into the CNRI building anyway. She'd broken his heart and he'd still gone back for her, to save her life. She didn't deserve him, deep down she'd always known that to be true. She didn't deserve him, despite her father always having imagined it to be the other way around. He was dead now and it was all her fault.

 _I laid beside you and pulled you close  
And the two of us went up in smoke_

It was always the same. Tommy'd rush into the CNRI building calling her name, he'd save her, and then get trapped himself, as had really happened. Although, in her dream, instead of escaping to live in this hell without him, she went to him, as she should've all along. She joined him, and held him, and the two of them went together into the next life, a better on than she had known without him. She'd treat him right this time, she was sure of it. Then, every time, she woke up.

 _Love isn't all that it seems I did you wrong  
I'll stay here with you until this dream is gone_

The nightmares came at first nightly, and then less often, although they were still more frequent than she cared to admit to. She liked to think that she'd moved past this trauma, that she'd grown up, as they all had, but it wasn't necessarily true. She didn't need the others to know what was going on with her, although she knew Sara and Thea at least had their suspicions. She didn't mind the nightmares so long as they didn't interfere with her Black Canary activities, she felt better knowing there was still a part of him with her, even now.

 _I've been sleepwalking, been wandering all night  
Trying to take what's lost and broke and make it right _

Thea Queen had always been like a little sister to Laurel, more so than Sara had in some ways, although the older girl would not trade on her relationship with her sister for her life. But Thea was like a sister to Laurel nonetheless, and when Oliver and Felicity senselessly ran out on the young girl, leaving her alone in the apartment when she'd once _died_ , Laurel was happy to move the girl in with her. Thea was happy too, because now she knew there was someone there for Laurel when the nightmares woke her up.

 _I've been sleepwalking too close to the fire  
But it's the only place that I can hold you tight  
In this burning house_


	7. I Could Handle This Pain

_My head is poundin'  
Too much red wine  
I wish I didn't love it like I do  
It gets to me every time_

She may have a drinking problem, but he had a sleeping-with-her-sister problem, so it's all pretty relevant, isn't it? And maybe she was being petty, and maybe he'd changed, but, hell, she wasn't necessarily in a forgiving mood, and she didn't think he deserved her forgiveness any time soon, either.  
Her father tried to talk to her, her mother too, in her rare appearances in Laurel's life, even Thea had tried to talk her down. But it wasn't how much she _hated_ Ollie that was the problem- it was how much she missed him despite it all.

 _I've never been held the way you held me  
I've never been hurt the way you hurt me  
I could handle this pain, forget your name  
If you hadn't loved me like you had  
Why'd you have to be as good as you were bad_

When they were good they'd been _so_ good. You wouldn't've imagined it, based off of the number of times they broke up or the number of times he'd cheated on her, but she wasn't crazy, they _had_ had their good times too. Oliver, Ollie then, had been scared of commitment, immature, and a thousand other terrible things, but he _had_ loved her. There'd been times when they he'd been so sweet to her, so caring. He'd wanted to marry her, after all, hadn't he? And he'd carried that damn picture of her around for five years, so clearly he felt something from her, and Lord knows she'd felt something for him.

 _They say you remember the past  
Better than it really was  
But there was a time when it really was  
So good_

She was good at playing the role of the scorned woman. She'd never make her peace with Oliver's role in Sara's death. Maybe an essential part of moving on was actually getting _away_ from the person; not making their barely-legal sister your new full-time ward and seeing them all over town. But, then again she and Ollie'd never had a typical relationship with one another, and now they certainly didn't now.

 _I could handle this pain, forget your name  
If you hadn't loved me like you had  
Why'd you have to be as good as you were bad_


	8. I Got The Boy, She Got The Man

**AN: After some time has passed...once Laurel's become the Canary and she and Olicity are all hunky-dory friends.**

 _I got the first kiss and she'll get the last  
She's got the future and I got the past  
I got the class ring, she got the diamond and wedding band  
I got the boy and she got the man  
_  
Laurel felt oddly calm watching Oliver propose to Felicity. It felt like a lifetime ago when she'd been sure it would be her becoming the future Mrs. Queen. She'd spend hours gossiping with her friends in those days, about her and Ollie's kids, and how they'd be adventurous and larger-than-life, like their daddy, and loyal and intelligent, like their mama. How they'd decorate the giant Christmas tree in the mansion together, all that silly nonsense that dopey girls dream about while the boy they envision as their husband is sneaking off with their little sister.

 _I got the first kiss and she'll get the last  
We each got something, the other will never have  
I got the long hair, hot head  
She got the cool and steady hand_

She was happy for the two of them, happy for the way that things were ending for Ollie. She was so proud that he'd finally become the man she'd always known he could be. And Felicity, well, she brought out the best in him, in a way that Laurel certainly never did. Maybe the two of them had history, but it was all that history that kept them from having any future beyond friendship.

A small part of her wished that she'd gotten a chance to be with this version of Oliver, but you can't change the way things were, and she'd finally managed to accept that. She'd had her good times while they'd lasted, and now it was someone else's turn.

 _I got the boy and she got the man  
I got the boy and she got the man  
If things were different and I had a choice,  
which would I choose?  
_  
It was important to note that she wasn't jealous of Felicity. Although she still definitely had feeling for Oliver- how could she not- given all they'd been through together, she didn't have the same competitive feelings towards Felicity as she had other girls who'd shown interest in Ollie while they'd been together, least of all her own sister.  
Perhaps it was that this new-and-improved Oliver was so far removed from the 'Ollie' she'd been with back in the days of their innocence- or rather, _slightly_ more innocence- that it felt like he was two different people. You can't miss something you never had, and she'd never had this Oliver, this man. She'd always love him, sure, but she surely didn't miss who he'd been.


	9. I'm A Liar

_I helped you find her a diamond ring  
You made me try it on and everything  
Tomorrow you'll both say "I do"  
And I'll be there 'cause that's what best friends do_

She couldn't help but be supportive of Oliver and Felicity. If he was happy, well, she was happy for him. Wasn't she? What other choice did she have? So, when he asked her to go ring shopping, even though it felt like someone'd punched her in the gut, she said yes. She'd always imagined he'd buy her a ring one day, but Lord knows nothing ever goes the way she plans it. She'd be there at his wedding, sure, but she wouldn't be the one in white. And she'd have to accept that, because that's what best friends do, and she'd rather be his best friend than his nothing at all.

 _I should win an Oscar  
Best actress in a show  
You always see me smiling  
Little do you know  
_  
"Do you like this one?" he asked her, completely oblivious. It was perfect, and she said so, smiling brightly. She hadn't known a heart could break more than one, but Ollie's put her through the wringer so many times it just kept splintering into smaller and smaller pieces. She didn't know how it was possible to still love him after all this heart break, but she was starting to think she was a glutton for punishment, just like her old man. She hated to admit it, but she loved this boy, despite it all.

 _I'm a liar, I'm a liar  
The biggest liar in the world  
I'm crying, I'm crying  
Like I've never cried before  
_  
Nobody seemed to see through the facade, but Thea. Diggle whole-heartedly believed she was over him, Felicity thought they were gal pals, and Ollie, well Ollie fell for it the most of all. Only Thea knew the real truth, and that was just because it was hard to hide all the tears from someone she spent nearly 100% of her time with. At the base, at home, the littler Queen was everywhere she were, and the other girl knew all the signs. Thea was missing Roy the same way Laurel was missing Oliver; there was no real reason for any separation, it existed purely to torture them both.

 _I know you always heard me say  
You'll meet the perfect girl one day  
The night you called and told me the news  
I said that I couldn't be more thrilled for you  
_  
"I'm really glad that you found Felicity, and I hope you find your way back to her. And Ollie, I know that I'm not the love of your life, but you will always the love of mine."


End file.
